Out of the mouths of babes...well this time just one babe.

Things to live by in my 3 year old's world.

Glow in the dark stars must be in every bedroom.

At our old house the people that lived there before put glow in the dark stick on stars to the ceilings of the bedrooms. Saige is still having problems sleeping in her own room, even after 2 months here. So we were in our bed one night and she said, "I don't like this house. I want the other one." Me "Saige this is our new house, it's ours now for forever. You are going to have to get used to it." Saige "But there is no stars." I deperately need to find some glow in the dark sticky stars.....

She likes her mama.

Micah asked her one evening if she liked her mama. She said "Yes, I like her. She's my girlfriend."

All cell phones need to be charged at night.

Getting ready for bed one night Saige gasped and asked Micah "DADDY where is your charger!"

If something smells nasty, it's Daddy's butt.

Saige started sniffing the air and she said, "What's that smell?" And Micah said he farted. She said, "Daddy, you need to take a shower and wash your butt!"

Crapazoid!

I was so trying to watch Grey's Anatomy last night. The girls and Bacon were playing and running around. Then with 10 minutes left, it was silent. I knew something was wrong. Gensen comes into the living room all panicy.

"Mom, Bacon just pooed on the floor and Olivia stepped in it!"

Now, if you know Olivia, if there was dog poo, or anykind of poo in a 20 mile radius that girl would step in it.

So I calmly go into the hall and there is turds there. I follow the grossed out sounds to my bedroom. There is shit EVERYWHERE! On my bed, flippin nasty!, on the carpet, scrunched up on the closet door. It looked like Vietnam with shit.

So I calmly get some toliet paper, in the process Gensen steps in it and freaks.

I get the biggest parts up and then get the Resolve. That stuff is my life saver. I am spraying and picking up clothes, I fling a sock and I didn't know there was poop on it and "SMACK" it hits the wall. Now the sock and shit are creapin down my wall.

At this point I am gettin quite pissed off. I have shit up to my eyeballs, Saige has toiliet paper trying to clean some. Olivia is still whining that she stepped in it, Gensen is scrubbing her foot, in my room(why, I don't ask why with that child), and I am still trying to figure out how in the hell shit got on my closet door and how I am going to get it out from under the door itself.

Finally I just yell to the older 2 to go to bed. I'm done. I had it.

So I finish cleaning the shit off of the wall, from under the door, as best as I could. (Glad I can't smell) And strip my bed.

Then Micah comes home. I tell him about it and then he said, "oh so you saw then where I threw up at last night."

"WHAT? It is 10:00 at night and you just now tell me you threw up in our ROOM!"

"Well I thought you would see it. "

So he shows me where he did it. It's clear, acidy stuff. I spray the hell out of that spot too.

Want some blood with that?

So, since we moved here to our new house, my vacuum is acting strange. The filters are getting all dirty really fast. So, after buying new filters, hoping that would majically solve the problem, it still is not working right. So I start investigating. I took it all apart, well best to my ability. And didn't see anything wrong. So I used it again, a dang penny flew up into the filter on top. Nothing is supposed to be there. That just isn't right. So I take it apart again, clean out the filters and start vacuuming again. Still not workin. By now I'm getting pretty mad. So I yank out the cup, and stick my hand up in it. That's the problem! I'm missing the plastic piece that goes up there! So I go to Wal-Mart thinkin they might have one. Nope. So I get on the website, nope. So I call the costumer service. I get the name of a dealer close to me, but I want to make sure that they have the piece.
So the wonderful lady comes on, I explain what I need, and she tells me it will be $1.02. Then she asks if I need filters or anything else. Nope done got some. I go ahead and ask her if the dealer close to me sells those. "No, I'm sorry, but they don't usually keep those in stock. We don't get that much demand for lost ones." Ok, so I'm an idiot that looses plastic pieces. So I give her my credit card number and she gives me a total. $8.52! "Um, so I'm paying like 7 times of what that thing cost in shippin?" "Yes, that is why I asked you if you wanted filters." Well shit!
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While I'm one here I'll let y'all know how graceful I am.
Last night Micah was down in the garage clean guns and bullets, getting ready for deer season. So I decided to grace him with my presence. I was wandering around, and noticed Gensen's skateboard. I looked at it and kicked it a little. I heard Micah say "Don't even try it, I've been drinking and I don't think Olivia will like driving to the ER." I stuck my tongue out at him and grabbed it. So I got on it, first time EVER. Oh I have been on one before, but it's been riding it down hill on my ass. So I get on it and I really don't know where to put my feet so I kick off and put the right one in front. Ok I think, this will work. I haven't fallin yet. So I do this a few times and I admit, I'm getting a little cocky. I look at Micah and say, "Look hun! I'm skating!" I take off, I go about 3 feet, ok I'm exaggerating a bit, might have been pushing 2, and all of the sudden I am flying! I actually have time to look around and see a horrified look on Micah's face, and then I hit the concrete floor, hard, on my left buttock. I hear 2 people totally loosing it laughing behind me. Olivia just happened to walk in and see me being a bird. I turn back around and scream "OW! MY ASS!" Micah says "I told..." I interrupted him and told him to shut up. Olivia is still in hysterics. I slowly make my way back up on my feet, and cussed out the skateboard. Now I have a nice purple and black bruise on my ass. I will never, ever step on a skateboard again.

New House

We finally bought our own house. Gosh! It's been crazy, I still have boxes to unpack, the playroom needs attention, and we got a beagle puppy, Bacon. Moving to a different town, different school district is wierd. I don't know anyone, the girls seem to be adjusting well. Saige is still askin about school. I quit my job, to far away to drive there everyday.